Sunday, April 26, 2015

DID THE DEVIL MAKE YOU DO IT?

I know God never 'makes' us sin. That leaves two things that do the sinning: the flesh (us and our sinful nature), a demon(s) hanging out in that person, or a combination of both. Let me explain...

Case #1 The enemy tempts and the flesh sins

If a child looks up at the cookie jar, and knows that there's a goodie in there, but was told not to touch it. The enemy comes along and says, "Oh, mom will never notice! Just go take one!" The child goes ahead and takes a cookie. In this case, it is the old flesh sinning. Sure it may have been the enemy who did the tempting, but it was the flesh that actually sinned. If the enemy was involved, it was through external tempting (he's on the outside doing his work).

Case #2 An iniquity exists

A iniquity is a weakness, sort of like anger or lust. I believe an iniquity can sometimes 'overwhelm' the soul into sinning. I like to think of an iniquity as "internal temptation" (the enemy is now able to tempt from the inside). A believe a lot of people who commit rape would have some iniquities built up in them that would give them such a strong urge to do such a thing. NO, I am NOT saying that the devil makes people rape, but what I am saying is that when an iniquity such as lust exists, and we continue to feed it, it grows, gets stronger, and it allows the enemy to put such a strong temptation on a person that it makes it hard on the person to resist living out those strong urges, etc. The person who raped is guilty of the sin, but he had been subjected to such strong temptation that it made him hard to turn it down. The solution is to break that iniquity, which is one of the reasons Jesus came and shed His blood for us. He was bruised for our iniquities - Isaiah 53. An iniquity is kind of like external temptation, except it's coming from the inside. The enemy has access into that person's soul (thoughts, emotions, feelings, etc. realm), and he's able to tempt us from the inside, which makes the level of temptation MUCH stronger and more irresistible.

Case #3 The "Devil made me do it!"

This is a more extreme thing. I read a story once of a serial killer who said that the devil truly 'made him do it.' Something "came over him" and he just couldn't resist killing. He murdered about 600 people, and Satan protected him from being caught. He would sit across the street and watch as the victims were talking with the police, and nobody would even notice him standing there! There's also extreme situations where a person can be demon 'possessed,' and wakes up in the middle of the night, goes to a coven (group of 13 witches) meeting, does a whole bunch of ritual stuff, worships Satan, etc. and goes back home before the sun comes up... goes back to sleep, and wakes up, knowing NOTHING that happened. That is obviously outside the control of the human will or flesh.

An example of this kind of 'demon possession' activity can be found in Luke 8:29, "For Jesus had already commanded the evil spirit to come out of him. This spirit had often taken control of the man. Even when he was shackled with chains, he simply broke them and rushed out into the wilderness,completely under the demon's power." (NLT) Some other verses to look up include: Matthew 8:28, Mark 5:5 and Mark 9:17-18.

Conclusion

My dad said that there's two men on your shoulders, and whichever one you listen to will crowd the other one out. If you live a careless life, and make a habit of sinning, you could open yourself up to iniquities and therefore you give the enemy room to tempt you from the inside, therefore the temptations can be much stronger and more irresistible... perhaps to the point where you can barely say no!

Wednesday, April 22, 2015

WHO IS TO BLAME?


There are often times when people try to blame everything on the demon, and avoid personal responsibility completely. I believe this is possible in extreme cases, but it is usually not the case.

Let's take a closer look at a spirit of anger. These spirits can cause a person to experience urges and feelings of anger. If the person gives in to those feelings, they can be found doing things like King Saul when he was about to kill David by throwing a knife across the room at him (after evil spirits have attached themselves to Saul). If a person has uncontrollable anger problems which they cannot seem to overcome, then I would suspect that a spirit is likely behind their struggle. But there's also a level of personal responsibility to where a person shouldn't be willfully showing their anger on the outside by being violent and then blaming it completely on a demon. It's one thing for a person to struggle against urges and feelings of anger, but another for the person to act out on those feelings. However, when a spirit is present, it becomes MUCH harder to control one's actions.

I also believe it is possible for a person to come under the demon's control, and in those cases the demon manifests directly without the person's will being involved, but this is a much less common scene. An example of this would be the man in the Bible who had the legion of demons...

Luke 8:29, "For Jesus had already commanded the evil spirit to come out of him. This spirit had often taken control of the man. Even when he was shackled with chains, he simply broke them and rushed out into the wilderness, completely under the demon's power

However, in most cases, I believe that the person has the ability to control their anger problems on the outside, even if a demon is involved. On the other hand, if a person has a consistent struggle against anger, then I would suspect a spirit is present and should be driven out. It is not normal for a person to struggle against urges and feelings of anger.

Blaming others keeps you angry!

We need to understand the relationship between anger and blame. What that person did to us, we are not responsible for; that was their sin and wrong doing, not our problem. How we respond to what they did to us, is our responsibility. This is how a person can be wronged, abused, damaged and wounded, then wind up with spirits inflicting them with torment and infirmities (see Matthew 18:21-35). It wasn't what they did to you, it's how you responded to the wrong they did which opened you up to the tormenters. We need to own or take responsibility for our negative emotions and anger. As long as we're blaming somebody, we're not going to experience freedom and victory over the anger (or other negative emotions) that we're trying so hard to get rid of.

If you've purposed it in your heart to forgive and you've taken responsibility for your reaction to their wrong, but you're still feel anger rise up within your heart, then there are two other possibilities that should be looked into. First, there could be a wounded area of the heart that needs to receive emotional healing ministry, and secondly, there could be spirits of anger, hate, resentment, etc., which need to be cast out.

Of course, the more you understand about how much God loves you, and paid the price for your total forgiveness, the easier it will be for you to forgive others. You can't freely give what you haven't freely received. You can't love others until you have first received the love that God has for you. One of the fundamental things that we all MUST have, is a rooting and grounded in the deep love that God has for us, or we'll never receive all the fullness that God has for us:

"That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that ye, being rooted and grounded in love, May be able to comprehend with all saints what is the breadth, and length, and depth, and height; And to know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with all the fulness of God." (Ephesians 3:17-19 KJV)

You know something else that has helped me forgive others, is picturing them burning in hell and crying out with absolute and total regret and anguish, being tormented forever and ever. Is that REALLY what I want for that person? If your good hearted, you wouldn't wish that upon your worse enemy. We should be praying for them because if they don't turn to Jesus, that's exactly where they are going when they die. They will pay for what they did to you forever and ever, with no relief. It will be far worse torment than you and I could ever experience while here on earth. Is that what you really want for them?

God loves you so very much that He sent His son to pay the total price for everything you have ever done wrong. He asks us one thing in return, that we would pass that love along to others. We need to be rooted and grounded in His love before we can freely and effortlessly give it to others. Until we get rooted and grounded in His love, it will take effort for us to love others. That is why it is absolutely crucial for us to learn about how God feels about us, how much He loves us, etc. 

Tuesday, April 21, 2015

HOW TO KEEP THE GIRL YOU LOVE

You've managed to capture the interest of the girl of your dreams. She's everything you've ever wanted in a romantic partner, and you would do just about anything to remain in the relationship with her for as long as possible, if not forever. Now the only question that remains is: How do you keep her interest? Maintaining a healthy, loving relationship requires a lot of work, but it is possible with the help of much thoughtfulness and effort on your part.

STEP 1

Practice open and honest communication within the relationship. Encourage her to share her thoughts and feelings with you and, in return, share your thoughts and feelings with her. Poor communication is among the leading causes of failed relationships. If your girl does not feel as though she can express her feelings, thoughts, concerns, wants or needs without you getting annoyed with her, she could end the relationship out of frustration.

STEP 2

Respect her individuality. A girl who feels that her boyfriend allows her to make her own decisions is more likely to remain in a relationship than a girl who feels as though her boyfriend is always trying to change who she is. Avoid comparing her to other girls, and just accept that she is her own, unique person. Encourage her to make the best decision for herself in every situation.

STEP 3

Surprise her with romantic gestures from time to time. Chances are that you performed romantic gestures to capture her attention early on in the relationship, so continue to do so now. The key is to avoid overdoing it. If you're playing the role of the gentlemanly knight in shining armor every night, she may get bored. However, if you surprise her with dinner or a warm bubble bath every now and then, you can ignite a new spark in your relationship every time.

STEP 4

Exercise a reasonable amount of understanding. Recognize that, like everyone else, your girlfriend is human and that she will sometimes do things that get on your nerves. Try to understand where she is coming from in these instances before instigating an argument. When arguments do arise, remember Step 1. Effective communication is especially important when tensions are high, so respect and acknowledge her perspective during disagreements.

STEP 5

Focus on the positive. Aside from effective communication, one of the key factors in many long-lasting relationships is a tendency to emphasize the positive. Instead of constantly pointing out your girl's flaws, remind her of the things that you love about her.

STEP 6

Love her and let her know it. Women, and people in general, have an innate desire to be loved. Tell her you love her often and, moreover, show her whenever you get the chance. There are many ways of showing her your love. You may also take care of a chore she has to do on a day she isn't feeling well or surprise her with a relaxing massage, for starters

WAYS TO ACCESS THIS LOVE AND CREATE AN AMAZING RELATIONSHIP, HOW TO LOVE A WOMAN:

1. Start by loving yourself

If you are unable to love yourself, you are unable to love someone else.

This is something that men, particularly, have trouble with. You might respect yourself, think you are absolutely amazing, but loving yourself, that’s a bit sissy.

No it’s not, it’s the basis of life and the basis of a balanced personality. If you have a troubled relationship you should look, first of all, to yourself, this is often where the trouble lies.

2. Tell her you love her

This is lesson two of how to love a woman. Tell her you love her!

This means saying the words so she completely understands and is in no doubt about it. You love her. She needs you to say this all the time and she needs you to volunteer it, not say it in reply to her questioning.

The worst thing you can say is, “You know I do.” She doesn’t, that’s why she’s asking… Duh…

3. Just love her for herself

Your love is not conditional, it is not based on any special qualities. You love her.

Women have qualities we love in them, perhaps they’re smart, or sexy, or inspirational, or funny, or even rich. This is not why you love her, you love her just because of her, nothing else.

Even though you celebrate everything that she is, even though you worship her for what she does in the world, she needs to know that you simply love her, no matter what. This is so crucial.

4. Live in your power

Whilst a man in love is an emotional being he must not stop being the man he is.

Your love should come from the power inside yourself, from your very soul. The love must be part of your power as a man and it must be part of how you live.

You must remain just who you are, you must be the man she met and fell in love with.

She finds excitement in your masculine strength, particularly when it laced with love. Don’t ever let her down.

5. Don’t live in the past

Never dwell on the past and use it to judge your woman.

Life does not always treat us well and we certainly don’t always treat life well. Things go wrong and we mess up. Strife in our loving relationship is something to let go of once it’s over, it’s something to let slip into the past.

We must learn the lessons and move on ensuring that we don’t go there again. Move on and live, always, in the present.

6. Get to know her

How often do you say, “My wife doesn’t understand me.” What you really mean is, “I don’t understand my wife.”

Love can only grow and deepen through understanding. You can never get to the point where you think you know everything about her, no woman is that simple. She is a complex person that even she doesn’t understand.

You need to love her and get to know her with patience and determination.

7. Count your blessings

Count the blessings you have together, the things you have achieved together, all that you are as a couple.

This should be a regular part of your life together. While I said, above, don’t live in the past, it’s ok to recount the great things in the past. This must be tempered with looking at the amazing things you are going to do in the future.

As a rule of thumb it is advisable to expect a future way beyond one that you can imagine. Expectations can lead to frustration if they limit you, expecting them to go way beyond is a good step into the future.

8. Give love, always

Love is about giving rather than receiving.

Love is a creative force that grows out of the desire to give more than you receive.

It is crucial that you are able to receive the love that is offerred to you otherwise it quickly dies, but you have to focus on the contribution you make to her.

“Give and you shall receive”, but give without expecting anything in return.

9. Pay attention to her

Women need attention all the time.

It is absolutely vital that you understand this. Many of the annoying habits that women have are merely attempts to get your attention. Take heed of them and pay attention.

Men are focused and directed and can easily lose themselves in what they are doing. This is one of the qualities that many women love in their men, but not to the exclusion of them.

You need to find a balance that shows how important your woman is to you without losing your passion for your mission.

10. Start afresh each day

Start again as if it was the first day of the relationship.

Welcome her into your world and look forward to your day together. Give her your love and tell her you love her. Do it again in a different way and repeat. I’m sure I don’t have to tell you where to go from here.

This refreshing of your love will keep it alive and bring you closer to each other. Through this your love will deepen and become an essential part of everyday you spend together.

♦◊♦

So what is love… really?

It’s an overwhelming emotion you have about another person, an emotion that you can’t truly explain but you can’t get rid of.

It makes you want to be with that person, hold them, touch them, have sex with them. It shows itself as an exchange of energy, a polarity, that excites your soul.

Love makes you feel great and totally transforms life. Love is worship of the other person, the woman who is divine for you.

FORGIVENESS AND RECONCILIATION

What is Sin?

Matthew 22:37-40, "Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets."

Anything that violates those two key commandments is a sin.

The Need for Forgiveness

When we commit sin, we put up a wall between ourselves and God. God loves us deeply, but He hates sin so much that it causes separation between man and God. Our sins are so great, that we cannot possibly repay them. The good news is that His love for us is so great, that He sent His only begotten Son to die on the cross as payment for our sins. The only way our sins can be forgiven, is when we receive the gift that His Son has given us on the cross.

Forgiveness and reconciliation is the most important part of the gospel. Without forgiveness of our sins, we face eternal separation from God. Anybody who dies who is separated from God, goes to a place of eternal punishment called hell; a place where there is no relief from the Lake of Fire (Revelation 20:15).

Forgiving Others

When a person sins against us, the enemy loves to place within us a wall against that person; a roadblock in our way of loving that person as Christ loved us. Forgiveness is basically a choice that we make to destroy that roadblock that is in our way of loving them as Christ loved us.

Jesus died to tear down the roadblocks caused by our sin between us and God, and we are required to do the same to those who wrong us (Matthew 6:15).

Seeking to restore a relationship

There may be times when we need to attempt to restore a broken relationship with another person. Jesus told us to love one another as Christ has loved us, and sometimes this may involve going to the person and telling them that you regret what you've done, and attempt to restore the relationship.

Matthew 5:23-24, "Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee; Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift."

If you have wronged somebody and it has caused them to have something against you, then doesn't it seem right to go to that person and try make things right? Remember, your goal isn't to rush into the room, yell, "I'm sorry!" and run away...your goal is to be reconciled with that person.

Matthew 7:12, "Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets."

It's a lot easier to forgive somebody when they come to us and confess their sin. When you go to somebody and ask for their forgiveness, what you are doing is helping them to break down the roadblock that the enemy may have put in their way of loving you as Christ loved them. You are aiding them in removing an obstacle in their life that may be preventing them from living the life that Jesus wants them to live. What your doing is helping to break down a wall that the enemy has tried to setup between you and them.

Now don't take me wrongly... I'm NOT saying that we must go back to everybody we've wronged and apologize for everything we've ever done wrong. That is legalism, and puts an impossible burden on many of us! What I am saying is that there may be times when you may have damaged a relationship with somebody, and it is important to restore it.

Please use common sense and direction of the Holy Spirit, as sometimes it can worse to go to somebody than to just leave it alone. If you wronged a prostitute 5 years ago, and are now happily married to the woman that God's given you... it might do more harm than good to go back to that person and try to be reconciled.

Forgiving Ourselves

It is often harder to forgive ourselves then to forgive others. But what we must focus on, is that when God has forgiven us, we are CLEAN (Psalms 103:12). We need to stop blaming ourselves for not being good enough, and accept the fact that our sins have been forgiven (1 John 1:9). God Himself doesn't even want to remember our sins (Isaiah 43:25), so why should we? Are we smarter then God to remember something He chooses to forget?

Receiving Forgiveness

1 John 1:9, "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."

In order to receive forgiveness, we must first recognize that we have sinned, confess our sins, and then believe upon Jesus for the forgiveness of our sins and that what He did on the cross, He did it so that we might be forgiven (Matthew 26:28). Without the blood which Jesus shed on the cross, there is no forgiveness for our sins (Hebrews 9:22).

True repentance includes turning from our sins, and not continuing to walk in them. If you seem to struggle with compulsive sinful habits, you may need to be set free from a demonic influence. It may be necessary to renounce your sins out loud, and command them to leave.

Freedom From Guilt

Guilt can serve two purposes, it can show us the problem so that we might repent and receive forgiveness, or it can rub our mistake in our faces and make us feel hopeless. The Devil is known for putting guilt on people, and is known as the accuser of the brethren (Revelation 12:10).

How can you tell the difference between condemnation (bad for us) and conviction (good for us)?

First, I'd like you to ask yourself, "Why am I feeling guilty? What is the purpose of this guilt?" Of course your feeling guilty because you've probably done something wrong, but there is a reason why your feeling guilty. There is a source or sponsor of your guilt; it could be God or it could be the enemy. God uses guilt to convict us (conviction) of our sins so that we might change and make things better (receive forgiveness), whereas the enemy uses guilt to burden us down and make us feel hopeless about what we have done.

When God convicts us, it's so that we might recognize the problem, and work on fixing it. When the enemy condemns us, it's to make us feel like there's nothing we can do about it, and give us a rotten feeling with no hope. Therefore, ask yourself, "Is this guilt trying to bring me to repentance, or is it trying to tell me what a loser I am?" God doesn't tell us what a loser we are, His desire is rather that we may be reconciled with Him and receive forgiveness from our sins. The enemy likes to show you the mess, while God wants to show you the solution.

If you have sins that you haven't repented from, then by all means, repent and turn from your wicked ways!! Don't try to blame your guilt on the enemy if you know your guilty and you haven't repented of your sins!

If your sins are forgiven (1 John 1:9), and the enemy is burdening you down with guilt, you may have to renounce the spirit of guilt, and command it to leave. Also, resist the Devil and he will flee from you (James 4:7).

A Clean Conscience

It's God's desire for us to believe upon His Son Jesus for the remission of our sins, and to have a clean conscience that has been cut off from our past guilt (Hebrews 9:14, Hebrews 10:2, Hebrews 10:22). He wants to forgive us of our sins for HIS sake (1 John 2:12) and He even chooses not to remember our sins (Isaiah 43:25)!

Monday, April 20, 2015

THE CHRISTIAN AND WORLDLINESS

What does Christian separation mean? Your effectiveness as a Christian hangs on your concept of what separation means. Perhaps most of our personal and church problems would be solved if we had a biblical concept of what it really is.

This question of separation has been a bone of contention among Christians for many, many years. Though I believe that the Scriptures are very clear on the matter, still I am sure that we will not solve all the problems in this article. But we do want to take a good look at the subject.

You won't read very far in the New Testament without becoming aware of some very pointed warnings to Christians concerning their danger from the world around them. Second Corinthians 6:14 is a very well known passage. "Be not unequally yoked together with unbelievers...and I will receive you, and will be a Father unto you, and ye shall be my sons and daughters, saith the Lord Almighty."

These words, "come out from among them, and be ye separate" have been nailed to the masthead of many denominations and church groups as the supremely important idea that Christians should heed in these days.

Then we have that very strong passage in I John 2:15-17, "Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world...For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world. And the world passeth away, and the lust thereof, but he that doeth the will of God abideth forever."

James comes out with probably the strongest word of all along this line for he says very flatly and plainly, "...know ye not that the friendship of the world is enmity with God? Whosoever therefore will be a friend of the world is an enemy of God."

Christians have rightly taken these passages very seriously. They have recognized that the Lord would not speak so plainly if there was not something serious involved. They've remembered the sad words of Paul concerning one of the young men who traveled with him: "...Demas hath forsaken me, having loved this present world." Christians have often had reason to see that a worldly Christian is a useless Christian. He is of no value to the world and no good to God. No man can serve two masters!

So Christians, as a result of these warnings, have through the centuries drawn up lists of things they considered worldly. Naturally, their ideas have differed widely on these matters. Whenever people had difficulty with some temptation or some particular type of recreation or some activity which gave them trouble, they learned a lesson from it, or thought they did, and marked that particular thing down as worldly.

So there came into being a great many different lists of worldly things, varying widely because of the different places of origin. As a result of this, we have today certain folks in the South called "hook-and-eye Baptists." They were given that name because they believe that buttons are worldly and that the proper biblical way to fasten your clothing is not with a button but with a hook and eye. So the button-wearing folks are worldly in their estimation, and the hook-and-eye people are spiritual.

And they mean it! They're quite serious about it. It's as much a worldly thing to them as some of the things on your list are to you. And they feel quite as upset over violations as you do when your standards are transgressed.

Standards differ widely in Christian circles about many things. Drinking beer by Christians is very normal in places such as Germany. They think nothing of having a glass of beer with their meals. Nobody thinks they are unspiritual because of it.

But in this country, it's quite a different matter. Here, beer drinking is almost always considered a worldly thing for Christians. I have been in parts of this country where people regarded mixed bathing with horror, that is, boys and girls going swimming together, even though they were all clad in quite acceptable bathing suits. It was the mixing of the sexes that was reprehensible. They thought it was terrible. Yet, in most places in the West, mixed bathing is not frowned upon at all. We consider it quite a normal, natural thing, and few would regard it as wrong.

There are places in this world today where lipstick is called "devil's grease" because some Christians are sure the devil is behind the lipstick business.

Now, I have mentioned things that most of us would laugh at as being considered worldly. I have touched upon a few of the things that are on our particular lists. The point I want you to see is that others may be just as disturbed about these things, as you are about the things on your list. And they, as we, pass along our taboos from generation to generation.

We all have a tendency to think that the things that we have been taught while we were growing up are inspired truth. Few of us have ever taken time to check these with biblical principles as to whether they are really true or not. I am afraid that many of us often mistake our prejudices for convictions. It is a very easy thing to do.

But we must remember that it is not what we have been taught, or what our fathers believed, or the way we were raised that is the standard of Christian behavior, but what the Word of God says. Always!

And if what we are taught is not in accordance with the principles declared in the Bible, then we had better review our standards and our thinking in accordance with those principles.

This is a very simple thing to say, and we all agree with it, but it is hard to carry out. If we follow it through, we will discover that it will make some great changes in our lives.

One result of his habit of categorizing things as worldly, and making an index of that which is right and wrong in the Christian life, has been that today nine out of ten Christians have mental lists of do's and don'ts. They call these lists their "Christian standards." And solely on the basis of such a list they blithely determine whether they are worldly or spiritual.

Now I don't wish to suggest that there are no Christian standards. There are necessities along that line, and those standards once arrived at in each individual life must be carefully adhered to. What I am saying is that the method by which we determine those standards must be in accordance with the Word of God and not simply our upbringing.

Now then, since most of the things that are on your particular list (and on mine) arc being done by the unsaved, worldly-minded people around us, there comes a tendency for us, consciously or unconsciously, to avoid temptation by avoiding worldly people.

There comes a marked tendency to withdraw, to seek our own crowd, to create our own little separate world---a world that is as complete as we can make it with recreation and education and all that we need from the cradle to the grave. We create our own smug, airtight circle in which we live and which we have set up to run competition to the "worldly" world outside.

Now ultimately, that kind of thinking produced the monasteries that appeared in the Middle Ages. Men decided that the way to avoid the temptations of the world was to completely seclude themselves from it, so they built high-walled monasteries and lived their lives inside and thus sought to avoid the world.

Today we do not build walls of brick and mortar in order to avoid these things, but we still have walls of thought and seclusion that are almost equally effective. In this way, we become twentieth-century monks, doing this very same thing.

And the worst tragedy of all, in my estimation, is that we are passing all this on to our young people. We are handing along these conceptions, as they pick up our way of life and our way of thinking. Instead of teaching them to overcome evil, we are teaching them to avoid it. They are not learning how to fight the good fight of faith. We do not know how to fight it ourselves, many of us, so how can we tell them? How can we show them?

Now what are the results of this type of separation? I do not speak from hearsay or from mere observation on this matter. I speak from very sad experience. An experience born of at least ten years of my Christian life that I now consider almost utterly wasted, because I was thinking and acting along these very lines.

Here were the results in my own life. I am confident, from observation, they are the results in other Christians' lives who think like this.

The first result is a terrible sense of boredom and frustration. Life becomes pale and uninteresting, especially Christian things. You just go through a routine. You go to church and go through a set formula of things you are supposed to do, but there is nothing very gripping, very fascinating, very challenging about it. Life becomes very boring. The challenge is gone.

Why? Because there is no sense of danger! There is nothing which demands a response from a young Christian faced with that kind of thinking. He is protected. He is sheltered. His life is arranged in such a way that the temptations are reduced to a minimum and consequently, he becomes bored and frustrated and feels no challenge. Life becomes very lackluster.

When we sense this in our lives, we often try to correct it by creating false challenges. "Come on, let's win the attendance contest," and we get all excited about the attendance contest. Or, "Let's gain a reputation in our church for having a tremendous missionary program, and let's parade the figures in front of us all through the years as to how much we are giving for missions," and so we create false challenges and false goals. Not that these things are wrong in themselves. The trouble is, it is done as a group, and the personal challenge in the individual life is gone.

"Today's Christians are like deep-sea divers, encased in suits designed for many fathoms deep, marching bravely forth to pull plugs out of bathtubs." That is putting it rather incisively, isn't it? But it is true! We are taught all the resources of the Christian life. For what? To win attendance contests with! To build buildings with! The challenge is artificial, the goal is sub-Christian.

Perhaps this is the major reason why our Christian young people today (and I say it sadly, because I see it in my own church) are so lethargic, so lackadaisical, so utterly pepless about their Christian lives. We find difficulty in getting them to avoid the things on our lists any longer. They would rather feel some of the stimulation and challenge and temptation of the world than to live such colorless, lackluster lives. God made youth with a desire to dare. It is no less so with Christian youth.

The second result of this isolationist separation is a tremendously increased amount of worldliness in Christian living! Does that seem strange? It is a paradox. Christians isolate themselves from the world to avoid worldliness, and it inevitably results in more worldliness.

You see, if you really believe that the only worldly things are those on your mental list, and you are careful to avoid them, then the result is you let down your guard at other points, and the world begins to seep in in a thousand places, unrecognized by you. Instead of being worldly in the ways that are on your list, you are worldly in a thousand other ways, all of them equally bad.

The truth is that worldliness is not a matter of things, of doing this, or not doing that. But worldliness is a matter of the attitude of the heart, the attitude of life in thinking and dealing with things. If we would just learn that, what a difference it would make.

Let me see if I can illustrate that. If you ladies wear a new dress in church in order to attract attention, that is worldliness! You are trying to attract attention to yourself, just as the world continually seeks to do. The fact that you do it in church makes no difference whatsoever. If anything, it makes it more reprehensible. If the opinions of others mean much to you in this matter of dress or conduct, then you are worldly. You may never drink, dance, smoke, or go to a nightclub; but you are just as worldly as if you did.

On the other hand, if you wear a dowdy, out-of-style dress to church in order to be thought spiritual, that is worldliness, too. The dress, you see, has nothing to do with it. It is the attitude of the heart, the motive behind the act, that constitutes worldliness.

If you must have a new car every year in order to keep up with the style, that is worldliness, pure and simple. If you need the car in your business for some reason, and you are quite honest with yourself about it, that is another matter entirely. For this reason, no one else can sit in judgment on you in such a matter. But the Lord knows the heart, and if you trade your car each year just to be in style, you are worldly.

If you are hurt because people do not notice you, that is worldliness. If a TV program conflicts with something that you know the Lord wants you to do---your attendance at church or prayer meeting, or to help your neighbor---that is worldliness. You have chosen that in place of the Lord's will.

Now I am not trying to make up new lists for you. If I kept on, you would soon stop me and say, "Why the way you talk, everything is worldly." And you would be quite near the truth. For everything is worldly, if the heart is concerned with the approval or disapproval of those around you, just as everything is spiritual when the eye is single unto the Lord. This is a tremendously important point.

Read what John says again, "All that is in the world: the lust of the flesh (that includes eating and drinking and sleeping and wearing clothes or whatever your body desires to do), the lust of the eyes (that includes the desire of anything you want to buy or possess, good, bad, or indifferent), the pride of life (the vainglory of life, the fighting for station, for promotion, for advancement), is not of your Father, but is of the world."

What does he mean by that? He means that everything is worldly if your attitude is worldly, but if your attitude is "of the Father", nothing is worldly. You see what he is getting at? This is why Paul said: "All things are lawful to me, but there are three limitations: I will not be brought under the power of any, all things are not profitable for me, and all things do not help others." Those are the only restrictions. Everything else is fine.

This is ~why we must not make up lists of "things" which we regard s inherently worldly and evil in themselves. Each of us may have our own personal areas into which, under God, we cannot enter. There are certain things you cannot do or do not want to do, not because someone else does not want you to, or because you think the church will frown on it, but because you feel the Lord does not want you to do this. But that must be decided individually.

What makes a thing worldly? Listen to John again, "All that is in the world...is not of the Father." That is the thing! You exclude the Father from your thinking, and when you do that you are worldly, no matter what you do. You do some act or take some step or make some plans without the Father, without taking Him into consideration, or concerning yourself with His will. That is worldliness! It may be a perfectly innocent thing in itself, but when you exclude the Father, it is of the world.

So the making of lists only increases worldliness. We then let down our guard about the things that are not on the list, and as a result, we become saturated with the world, steeped in worldly thinking, worldly acts, and worldly deeds. And he that is a friend of the world is an enemy of God!

Now the third great result of this type of thinking is a noticeable lessening of the spirit of sacrifice in our lives. When we avoid worldly people because we are trying to avoid worldliness, we also lose most of our opportunities to give of ourselves, for Christ's sake. This process of withdrawing into our own watertight Christian circle of affairs results in people becoming insensitive and unsympathetic and eventually smug and complacent in their views toward others.

We can get all worked up over missionaries ten or twelve thousand miles away, but people can live right next door to us and be perishing in their spiritual agony, and we do nothing.

That is worldliness. It results from this business of thinking we can live our own lives; that we can withdraw from the world and create our own Christian world and live within it.

Consequently, we have changed the Lord's words, "Go ye", into "Send ye", and we think if we are sending out people to the mission field, this is the adequate answer to our own responsibility. But the Lord did not say, "Send ye". He said, "Go ye into all the world". And I don't think He meant that only geographically. I am sure it is meant psychologically, as well. Go into all the ways of the world, into its thinking, into its attitudes, in order that you might understand and have some sympathy with the poor dying wretches who live next door to you that are in the world and lost in the world.

This is one of the most tragic things about our Christian lives. We become disobedient Christians. We forget our own personal responsibilities in witnessing. We talk about witnessing, but we seldom ever do it. We are embarrassed about it. We confess in moments of honesty that we are very ill at ease in this process of trying to witness about Christ. We really feel little enthusiasm for it, yet this is what He asks us to do.

We are supposed to be imitating our Master who gave up all things, who pleased not Himself, who laid down His life in order that He might win the lost worldlings to Himself.

But when it comes to us, we don't want to give up an afternoon of golf, or a night of bowling, or open our homes, or even give up some time on Sunday to do something to win these lost ones. And we justify it all by the excuse, "They are so worldly that we have nothing in common with them."

Isn't this the truth? Doesn't this describe us? When I think sometimes of our comfortable, easeful, luxurious lives, and then read in the Scriptures about those early Christians who loved not their lives unto death, I tell you I grow sick with the very shame of it.

Why have we lost the spirit of glad sacrifice? I think it is due greatly to our view of separation which has built a shell about us, so that we no longer see the need for our help. This is the terrible tragedy of it. We are living in the midst of people who are dying for what we have, who are hungry of soul and are putting bullets through their heads, jumping off bridges, turning on the gas, and living in utter misery year after year after year. And they don't live 10,000 miles away. They live two blocks down the street, two houses away, right next door to us, behind us, all around us, and we don't see the need for sacrifice!

We have become deaf in the cries that surround us. We have become indifferent to all hands that reach out from every side. We have taken the place of the Pharisee and the Levite in that parable of the Good Samaritan, who each passed by on the other side of the road when they saw the wounded traveler, lest they become defiled themselves by helping him. That is not the modernist or the liberal. That is the fundamentalist Christian, who is so concerned about being defiled with worldliness that he has lost touch with the world. He is no longer interested in helping worldly people, in meeting their problems, in becoming friends with them and meeting their needs.

Now there are many people who sense the hypocrisy of this kind of living, and they try to remedy it by going to the other extreme. They rush out and begin to mix with the world in every way. The drink cocktails and take up card playing and small gambling and learn how to dance, and thus try to live in with the world.

Now again I am not trying to make lists of taboos, please don't misunderstand me. I am simply trying to characterize the thinking of many who react to Christian isolationism. They adopt the world's standards and the world's values in the hope of being some influence to the world for Christ.

The result of that is always tragic. When we become like the world, we lose all our power to influence the world. I remember reading of a boy who had a cage full of sparrows, and he thought it would be nice to teach the sparrows to sing like canaries. So he bought a canary and put it in the cage with the sparrows. After a couple of weeks, he came running to his mother and said, "Mother! The sparrows are not singing like the canary. The canary is now chirping like the sparrows!" That is the inevitable outcome of becoming like the world in order to reach the world.

If you want to see the folly of a life like that, go out and stand by the shores of the Dead Sea and look at the cheerless, dreary, lifeless waste. Then go read the story of Lot who moved into Sodom in order to win it and influence it by his life, and see what he lost as a result. That dreary desolation stands as a mark of the folly of moving in to be like the world.

Well, then, what is the answer? How do we reach the world and still not be like it? The answer is, we must learn to live on a frontier between these two extremes. We must learn to be in the world, but not of it.

We must be in the world, we must seek out worldly friends and deliberately cultivate their friendship. We must invite them into our homes, and go into theirs.

We will have to ignore some things that are irritating to us, their habits, their ways of thinking and talking. But we must make friends with them. We dare not shut ourselves away from the perils and dangers and dilemmas of the world around us. Our Lord forbids us to! We must be in the world, seek worldly friends, but we must not be like the world.

The word that we need to emphasize is not separateness, that is, if you think of it as withdrawing. But the real word, and perhaps the best translation here is distinctiveness. We are to be distinct, different. Dare to be different. We must be in the world like our Lord was-in it up to the hilt. But, like Him, we must never live under false colors.

We must not think like the world. Our attitude is to be different our values must be different. Yet we are to be with them.

We ate to be out-and-out Christians. Distinct, but not distasteful. We are to be sheep among wolves, as our Lord said. That is. we are not to stay in the sheepfold. If we do, we are disobedient, for He sent us out of the sheepfold. He wants us out among the wolves!

"But", you say, "isn't that dangerous for sheep to go out in the midst of wolves?" Yes, it is. Of course, it is. But that is what makes it gripping and vital. That is exactly what makes the Christian life so revolutionary, so interesting, challenging, stimulating. It is the danger!

The Lord wants us to live on a frontier where we are constantly under subtle attack, yet He knows we will be safe among the wolves and we become the instruments by which some of the wolves become sheep like ourselves.

"But", you say, "isn't this difficult? Doesn't it present a lot of problems? Aren't you constantly having to make adjustments and make decisions, and wouldn't it be so much simpler just to avoid the whole matter?"

Of course it would. But where did we get the idea that we are here to avoid difficulty. Jesus said, "I am come to cast fire on the earth, and would that it were already kindled!" Whoever said the Christian life was to be easy? That is the whole trouble with it. We have made it so easy that we have few problems any longer, and so we have no power.

Our Lord wants us to have problems. He wants us to be constantly wondering what to do about a particular situation and to think it through, and test solutions according to the Word, and pray our way to an answer that satisfies and works. He likes us to live that way. That is what makes life challenging and interesting. Any other approach becomes boring and meaningless.

Saturday, April 11, 2015

THE PROVERBS 31 WOMAN

Proverbs 31:10, “Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.”

What is a "Proverbs 31 woman"?  It is a woman who is pleasing to God; and in order to be pleasing to God (in the case of a married woman), she must be obedient and committed to her husband's happiness.  She must be committed to the well being and safety of her children, to loving them, and to promoting their spiritual growth.  No feminist is a Proverbs 31 woman!  No whorish, above the skirt wearing floozy, is is a Proverbs 31 woman!  She is NOT pleasing to God.  No lazy wife, who causes her husband grief, is a Proverbs 31 woman.  Let's go through these Scriptures and find out exactly what the Word of God defines as a Proverbs 31 woman, a godly woman.  Most articles on the Proverbs 31 woman which I have read don't say much, so I'm going to break it down, and give it to you in simple terms.Verse 10 - Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.

All the money in the world cannot buy loyalty.  Wealthy men may have their whores and mistresses; but, money cannot buy genuine love, which is a gift from God.  A woman of God is virtuous, wears dresses (modest clothing), and knows the dangers of teasing the opposite sex.  Many women today are horribly malicious, actually enjoying teasing married men to lust upon them.  Can you imagine how hot Hell will be for such home-wreckers if they die without Christ as Savior?  Of course, God doesn't want anyone to die in their sins (2nd Peter 3:9).

Verse 11 - The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.

Many men don't trust their wives; therefore, they have separate bank accounts, hide the mail, keep things from their wife, etc.  You'd be shocked if you knew just how many married couples don't trust each other.  I know a man who won't let his wife touch the mail because she loses it, or hides things from him.  Many angry wives have cleaned out the bank account and skipped town.  One man told me that his wife stole R20,000 from their account, money they had agreed would be spent to pay bills.  One of the first things many sinful wives do when they get angry at their husbands is to hurt him financially (cause him spoil). Verse 12 - She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.

Again, many wives hurt their husbands when they get angry.  Nothing is more devastating to a man, than to find out that his wife gave her body to another man.  The wife's body belongs only to her husband (1st Corinthians 7:4).  Adultery is a horrible sin in the sight of God, and the excruciating emotional pains last a LIFETIME for the betrayed spouse.  Many wives lie to their husbands, being deceitful behind his back, slander him, and dragging people into their marriage problems.  This is all evil.Verse 13 - She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.

In modern times, we are blessed with inexpensive clothing.  This Verse simply means that her children are well dressed for the weather, and for the occasion.  I do believe that one of the great lost arts is that of making clothing.  I think all girls should learn how to make sweaters, knit, and crochet.  I think every girl should learn to cook without the microwave.  We are living in a lazy and wasteful generation, who don't know how to do anything for themselves...so they spend a lot of extra money for convenience sake.Verse 14 - She is like the merchants' ships; she bringeth her food from afar.

She knows how to cook, she learns the recipes, and can cook things that are popular in other cultures.  She wants to give her family the best.  No wife has an excuse not to be a great cook.  There are free recipes online for everything from eggrolls, to Mediterranean dishes.Verse 15 - She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.

She is not lazy, she does what needs to be done.  This woman in Proverbs got up before the sun did, and fed her family.  I have known children who went to school hungry because of a lazy mother, who didn't feel like getting up to make breakfast.  I've known husbands who ate at McDonalds regularly, because of a lazy wifewho didn't think to make him a lunch.  I knew a man who got food poisoning, because his lazy wife didn't properly care for the food before making his lunch.  Every wise woman should have a desire to learn about food-born-illnesses, and how to prevent them.Verse 16 - She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.

A little thought needs to go into this Verse.  It is obvious that no wife would make such a big financial decision without her husband's involvement.  I believe this Verse relates back to Verses 11 and 12.  It simply means that she has good judgment, and she is able to think for herself, and can; therefore, help her husband in many ways.  Contrary to the popular feminist fantasy concerning home-makers; God-fearing woman, who obey their husbands, and stay at home, can make intelligent decisions. Verse 17 - She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.

She is physically active; not a couch potato.  One of the reasons many women have strokes and heart attacks is because they live a sedentary lifestyle.  The Proverbs 31 woman doesn't smoke cigarettes, she takes care of herself, and sets the proper example for her children to follow.  It is certainly a good idea for woman to exercise, and I don't believe there is anything wrong with a woman exercising at local women's only fitness center (provided that proper attire is worn).Verse 18 - She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.

She works long hours into the night sometimes; but, she doesn't ignore her health.  She does get adequate sleep at night (and perhaps a nap in the day).  I believe moms need a 1-2 hour nap in the afternoon.  She is a balanced woman.  She works hard; but knows when to take a break.  She is good at what she does because she has made an art of the things in her life.  She is an expert at romance, cooking, and taking care of the home.  Of course, this takes several years to achieve.  You can't do everything at once.  Every wife is either improving or slacking off. Verse 19 - She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.

She is not lazy.  The proverbs 31 woman stays busy, she doesn't sit around loafing all day.  Many women sit home watching soap operas, smoking cigarettes, drinking coffee, surfing the internet; yet, they don't do their duties as a wife and a mother.  Every working husband should come home to a waiting wife, who happily greets him at the door, and rolls out the red carpet for him.  I feel sorry for the children who have to go to school, while mom stays in bed sleeping.  If a wife doesn't have to work outside the home, then she should earn her keep.  Shame on those lazy wives who don't care for the home, while their husbands faithfully go to work every day and pay the bills.  No husband should have to continually ask his wife to clean the house, and to pick up after herself.  No husband should smell dishes stinking in the sink when he comes home, or see piles of dirt which haven't been picked up off the floor.Verse 20 - She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.

She has concern for the less fortunate.  This does not mean that she endangers herself by going into bad neighborhoods.  It simply means that she donates her time  and money (if she can) to help the poor; but, her family always comes first.  No mother should ever help others before helping her family.  In the real world, many married couples are living on a shoestring and don't have any extra money.  Obviously, this Scripture is conditional upon one's financially situation.  A Gospel tract should always be given as well.  In today's world, you have to be very careful about giving beggar's money, as some of them are criminals and may assault you.  God is simply saying that a godly woman will not be selfish.  Look at all the wealthy people in this world, who horde their money.  If they do give anything, it is chump change compared to their hundreds of thousands they own.Verse 21 - She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.

Her kids don't go to school improperly dressed.  I've seen kids going to school in 40 degree weather with no coat.  Many kids don't have a sense of temperature, and don't care if they have a coat or not.  A lazy mother who doesn't care won't even notice her kids improperly dressed.  This is irresponsible.  A godly mother will keep an eye on her kids at all times.  So many mothers are idiots--letting their kids wander out of sight, going to school with no lunch, or doing dangerous things.  There are plenty of second-hand stores nowadays (my favorite places to shop).  Every child should have a warm coat for the cold weather, and shoes without holes in them.Verse 22 - She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple.

She knows how to seduce her own husband.  She is an expert at love-making.  Many wives fail in this area, not romantically satisfying their husband's needs.  To a man, sex is much more than just a physical union.  The mental aspects of romance must not be ignored.  A wise wife will give her husband the expressions, sensualism, and thrills that he needs.  If you don't do it, then your husband will be frustrated.  We are living in a whorish generation, where women deliberately try to seduce and tease men.  A wise wife realizes this and does her best to be her husbands biggest seducer, and secret lover. Verse 32 - Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.

She is every man's dream.  Other men respect her virtue, and loyalty to her husband.  They know that this woman is a lady, and she doesn't have the flirting eyes of the silly woman.  She is an asset to her husband, and not a liability.  Her husband is well respected because of the wife's testimony.  So many wives are a reproach to their husbands (1st Timothy 5:14).Verse 24 - She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.

She is industrious and looks for honest ways to earn some extra money.  She sees her husband's concerns over finances, and wants to help him if she can.  However, in today's world, things are different than from Bible days.  It was difficult to find clothing back in Bible days, there were no mass producers of clothing like today.  Hence, it would be foolish for a wife to try to make and sell clothing today, which can be bought dirt cheap at the store.  It would be better to make something unique, which cannot be found in the stores.  The idea is to do something that is going to make money, but not at a loss.  There are MANY ways in which wife can earn money.  Cleaning businesses are a good market in wealthier areas.  You clean people's homes on a weekly basis, etc.  Animal-sitting is popular.  People drop their dog or cat off, and you watch them while they're on vacation.  Please keep in mind that the woman in Proverbs 31 was trying to help her husband.  If your husband has a good job, then you don't need to earn extra money.  Again, the context of the Scripture is that a godly woman is not a couch-potato who sits around doing nothing.  The Bible is not saying that every wife has to make money, not at all.  The Bible is simply saying that she stays busy, using her time wisely for the benefit of her family.  The applications are limitless.Verse 25 - Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come. 

She has the right priorities in life (Matthew 6:33).  She keeps her eyes on Jesus Christ, and knows that there is always light at the end of the tunnel when problems arise.  She reads and studies the Bible, meditating upon God's Word throughout the day.  She has faith in God.  She is able to handle problems which would cause other women to run to shelters or file for divorce.  She doesn't run from her problems, she weathers the storms of life.  She will one day be happy that she didn't divorce her husband, or cheat on him, when all hope seemed lost.  When she couldn't see her hand in front of her face, she didn't give up and quit on her marriage.  She is a real trooper, hanging in their when her husband was under Satan's attack.  Fifty years ago, a mother could have 10 children and handle all the housework by herself.  Today, a mother needs a babysitter, counselor, friends, mother, and the whole neighborhood to raise one brat.  Women have lost old fashioned character.  Wives nowadays run out the door, go back to mama, and many file for divorce.  This is sinful, and an indication of the moral decline in America.Verse 26 - She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.

She is no fool.  She knows Biblical principles, and has good sense.  She keeps her mouth shut most of the time.  When she does talk, it's worth hearing.  She never curses or uses profane language.  She never tells or listens to dirty jokes.  She doesn't waste her time talking with shallow people, who like to gossip and slander others.  She doesn't gossip or listen to gossip.  She never speaks evil of any man.  She respects the manhood of other men.  I once knew a woman who liked to deride other men by continually referring to her husband as a "real man."  This is not Christian.  A godly woman respects the manhood of other men; but, she is extremely careful not to directly praise other men.  Men are hungry for praise, and for a woman to give them attention.  Don't do it ladies.  No woman should ever brag on any man other than her husband.  The fastest way to anger and hurt your husband is to brag on another man.  Every husband wants to be his wife's ONLY hero.  However, don't criticize or slander other men either.  Every man has his dignity.Verse 27 - She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.

She doesn't eat until her family has eaten.  She is in charge of the housework, and knows what is what.  She doesn't lose things--she has a place for everything, and puts everything in it's place.  She is organized.  Her house is clean.  She knows all the emergency phone numbers, and is prepared to deal with medical emergencies.  She knows the poison hotline.  Perhaps she has even taken a CPR and First Aid course.  She is careful with food preparation, and washes her hands.  Her home is disinfected, and it smells clean.  She is careful to wash the dishes correctly, not leaving soap film on the plates.  She is careful not to give her husband cracked glasses, or food with hair in it.  She doesn't leave her children unattended.  She reads to her kids, and listens to them read to her.  She knows about nutrition, and her family gets plenty of grain and vegetables.  She is careful not to give too many sweets to the family.  She knows that fluoride is poison, and filters her families' drinking water.  She doesn't like chemicals in the food, so she tries to prepare more homemade meals.  The lazy woman will buy nothing but prepared foods, feeding her family loads of sodium and toxic sodium aluminum phosphate (most baking goods).  Every wife should be an expert in nutrition.  Every wife should read, ask questions, and get informed concerning everything that she is responsible for.  I'm amazed how many wives and mothers go about their roles haphazardly.Verse 28 - Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her. 

How many men are always fighting with their wives because she is lazy?  Many!  Many men are miserable because of a lazy wife who won't spend 5-minutes in front of a mirror to pretty herself up.  I heard a man criticize his wife, saying that she placed them into debt by buying a living room furniture set they didn't need.  Another man said he was mowing the lawn on a hot summer day and asked his wife for a glass of water.  She said, "Get it yourself" and never brought it.  Another man rejoiced when he received an extra bonus check at work, because his wife didn't know about it and wouldn't confiscate it.  These men all spake poorly of their wives.  The Proverbs 31 woman doesn't make her husband miserable, she is a help instead of a burden.  So many married men are miserable, including Christian men, because of lazy lackadaisical wives.  Often, even the children get upset with her, because she blames the kids for her faults.  I've heard mothers curse at their children, screaming and yelling at them, like they were criminals.  This is sinful.  What does your husband say about you?Verse 29 - Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.

Very few, and I mean very few, women are like the Proverbs 31 woman.  Very few husbands are truly happy in their marriage.  So many wives lie to their husbands, being deceitful and hiding things from him.  I feel sorry for the man who's wife waits 10 years to tell him some bad news, breaking his heart.  Those are horrible words when a wife says, "There's something I should have told you 10 years ago."  What a horrible thing to do to a man.  There was a wife who led her husband to believe that she was a virgin before they married.  They were both Christians and had never dated anyone except each other.  The wife decided after 7 years of marriage to tell her husband that she was sexually molested by a much older step brother when she was a little girl.  The husband was forever devastated.  

As you can imagine, that permanently destroyed any family relations.  The man never spoke to the wife's family again.  The wife should have kept her mouth shut.  Better yet, she should have told her husband before they married what had happened.  She might as well have shot that poor man in the head, because he wished he were dead when she dropped the bomb on him.  I've heard testimonies from men of their wives stealing from their them, cleaning out the bank account, destroying their personal property, lying to them, using the courts against them, dragging meddling people into the marriage, etc, etc, etc..  So sad, so tragic, so evil.Verse 30 - Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.

We are living in a sex-perverted generation where girls are trained at the earliest age to be whores.  The godless music being aimed at young girls is being produced and sung by Satan worshippers like Madonna, and lascivious causing perverts like Britney Spears, Hilary Duff, Jessica Simpson, etc.  Truly, beauty is only skin deep.  One day, all their physical beauty will fade, and an old broken body will be all that remains.  Death is inevitable (Romans 6:23).  The sinful world worships youth, and the rebellion of youth.  1st John 2:15-17 plainly teaches that the world and the lusts thereof will all pass away.  Nothing will matter 100 years from now except what you do with Jesus Christ.  Will you accept Jesus as your personal Savior, as payment for your sins; or will you reject Christ, and die in your sins?Verse 31 - Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.

She has EARNED the right to relax and enjoy the fruits of her labors.  Many wives are bums, having a welfare mentality, parasiting off their husbands.  This is very wrong.  A Proverbs 31 woman wants to work with her husband, to make the marriage and family something to be proud of.  

Let me also add here at the end of our discussion, that the advice given from Verse 10 through 31 was NOT given to a woman; BUT, to a man, king Lempel (Verse 1).  It was advice from a wise mother, given to her son to help him choose the best wife to marry.  Perhaps we should call this passage of Scripture, the Proverbs 31 man, since it is advice given to man.  Carefully notice the warnings about alcohol given to the husband in Verses 1-9.  No alcohol-drinking man deserves a Proverbs 31 wife.  Why should he have a good wife to beat, and be abusive to her?  So many men who drink beer, live in sin, avoid church, curse in God's name, and chase women...wonder why they can't find a decent wife.  Solomon didn't write Proverbs 31.  Solomon never could find the woman of his dreams (Ecclesiastes 7:28).  Why?  Because Solomon had a reputation, a very bad one.  All his wives were the lazy whores who wanted his money...take care of us Solomon...and we'll give you the sex you want.  Solomon had many lovers; but, he couldn't find the godly wife that he so much desired.  Solomon tried to seduce the beautiful Shulamite girl in Song of Solomon; but, she wisely turned him down, and for good reason.  Solomon here represents Satan, who tries to seduce us away from Christ.  

This whole Chapter describes a woman who loves her husband and children with all her heart, and works to give them the best.  Jesus said that all of the Bible is fulfilled in two commands (Matthew 22:38-40): 1) Love God with all thy heart, 2) Love thy neighbor as thyself.  Also, in Galatians 5:14.  The woman who loves her husband and family doesn't need books, educational courses, or helps.  Through DESIRE, she will become everything that her family needs her to be (Proverb 18:1).  It's certainly acceptable for a wife to read helpful books, gaining insight from other women who have already proven themselves godly mothers; BUT, it is not necessary.  The Word of God is the only Book we need.  All the books, videos, and college courses in the world mean nothing if a wife and mother doesn't care. 

In conclusion, there is no such thing as a perfect wife, or husband.  The key to happiness in a marriage is two people who are mutually committed to making the marriage a success.  Many marriages are lopsided, where one spouse shirks their responsibilities, and the other is continually getting upset because of it.  This is unfair.  A happy marriage requires a team effort between husband and wife.  Many husbands are brute tyrants, who won't allow their wives to live.  This is true of religious men especially, who are taught that the wife is supposed to be submissive to her husband. 

Although the Word of God certainly does set forth the man as the head of his household, it doesn't give him any right to be unkind or abusive towards his wife.  Many Christian wives are slaves to a religious .  I say this kindly.  I believe that God wants every wife to be as the woman in Proverbs 31; but, God also expects every husband to be as the husband in Ephesians 5:25-33.  Every husband should be an Ephesians 5 man.

Friday, April 10, 2015

A GOOD WIFE

Blessed is the man that hath a good wife, for the number of his days shall be double.  A woman of courage rejoiceth her husband, and he shall fulfil the years of his life in peace.  A good wife is a good portion, and she will be given in the portion of them that fear the Lord.  When rich or poor, a good heart, at all times a cheerful countenance.  There be three things that mine heart feareth; and for the fourth I was sore afraid: the slander of a city, the gathering together of an unruly multitude, and a false accusation: all these are worse than death.  But a grief of heart and sorrow is a woman that is jealous over another woman, and a scourge of the tongue which communicateth with all.  An evil wife is a yoke shaken to and from: he that hath hold of her is as though he held a scorpion.  A drunken woman is a  great anger, and she will not cover her own shame.  The whoredom of a woman may be known in her haughty looks and eyelids.  Over thy daughter that is wanton, keep strait watch, lest she find overmuch liberty, and use it.  Watch over an impudent eye: and marvel not if she trespass against thee.  She will open her mouth, as a thirsty traveller, and drink of every water near her: by every tent peg will she sit down, and open her quiver to every arrow.  The grace of a wife will delight her husband, and her skill will fatten his bones.  A silent woman is a gift of the Lord; and there is nothing so much worth as a soul that is disciplined.  A modest woman is grace upon grace, and there is no scale that can weigh a continent soul.  As the sun when it ariseth in the Lord’s heaven; so is the beauty of a wife in the ordering of her house.  As the clear light is upon the holy lampstand: so is the beauty of the face in ripe age.  As the golden pillars are upon the sockets of silver; so are the fair feet with steady feet.  (My son, keep the flower of thine age sound; and give not thy strength to strangers.  When thou hast gotten a fruitful possession through all the field, sow it with thine own seed, trusting in the goodness of thy stock.  So thy race which thou leavest shall be magnified, having the confidence of their good descent.  An harlot shall be accounted as spittle; but a married woman shall be a tower of death to them that use her.  A wicked woman shall be given as a portion to a wicked man: but a godly woman is given to him that feareth the Lord.  A dishonest woman contemneth shame: but an honest daughter will reverence her husband.  A shameless woman shall be counted as a dog; but she that is shamefaced will fear the Lord.  A woman that honoureth her husband shall be judged wise of all; but she that dishonoureth him in her pride shall be counted ungodly of all.  Happy is the husband of a good woman, for the number of his years shall be double.  A loud crying woman and a scold shall observe a rout like a trumpet of war.)  There be two things whereby my heart is grieved; and by a third anger came upon me: a man of war in want because of poverty; and men of understanding that suffer contempt; and one that returneth from righteousness to sin; the Lord prepareth such an one for the sword.   A merchant shall hardly keep himself from doing wrong; and an huckster shall not be freed from sin.